I’ve been crying a lot. A lot of time has been spent processing through hurt and the harm that had built up like plaque between two teeth. There does not seem to be a timestamp on the hurt or harm. There isn’t much in the way of attached memories. These feelings just rise up and […]Read more "Somehow"
I’ve been on a personal growth route, spurred by lifelong conditioning and innate competitiveness with my heterosexual life partner. I don’t even know if she ever competes with me….I’ll have to ask her. I digress. I have learned many things in my first year teaching preschool. I have learned to stop fearing the worst and […]Read more "I’m all growed out"
I went caroling. On my way downtown I consciously asked the question; What does success look like tonight? Because The NorthWest is notorious for rsvping and not showing. Life happens, this is not a judgement, but it leads social creatures to many sad nights. At least those who persist in organizing public events. (I’m sending […]Read more "Winter Break"
I’d go so far as to tell you that I’m pretty stellar at balancing the changes, both good and bad, that have rolled my way, not to mention riding through the ambiguity and uncertainty with a balanced, caring and positive attitude, when I’m not venting my spleen in a dark pool of acknowledgement and processing . Well, apparently I’m hitting a wall […]Read more "Just one thing!"
I seem to really get into dubstep when I’m low. The lyrics can be insightful. I am overwhelmed. Not by the amount of work I have to do, but by the ambiguity of the end product that’s being requested. ookay, and the sheer amount of work that requires a fairly controlled timeline of completion, which […]Read more "Take Me Home"
I’m at the beginning of a brand new emotional-cycle. It’s not unlike sitting in that suspended bubble of time, on the top of the roller-coaster. Edging along the boundaries of ignorance and sadness. I remember feeling this way last year. Gawlly, has it been a year?! So much has changed and so much is exactly […]Read more "Forward"
I’m furious that my house is dirty. I’m furious that I don’t have a dishwasher and the dishes seem to be a never ending pile on the tiny fucking counters. I’m furious that my children have no concept of “too far”. I’m furious that no one knows how to respect my fucking boundaries, including my […]Read more "Every Little Thing"