my greatest defense mechanism is forgetting. Post-trauma (even moderately small traumas) I get depressed, I get sleepy, I sleep, I wake up having forgotten enough to make recall a real pain in the ass. I’m so exhausted but I’m not ready to forget. and yet, little pieces are already fleeing the edges as to why I have had such a hard time, emotionally, lately.
I came here with the intent to write but I can’t seem to drum up the give a damn to work for the recall and the processing. It is so much easier to write about the projects and the connections and the things external to me but part of me.
“Why are you crying?”